Also, since the LW doesn't give details, I do wonder about exactly what Lisa has said. In my experience, people who haven't lost someone are often so uncomfortable around death that if a loved one talks about their dead, that can often be perceived in all kinds of surreal ways. I've talked about my dead loved ones in completely innocuous ways and had some people, even very dear friends, react with such discomfort that they left the room. Other times people have perceived me to be saying something about my dead relatives as if I were making a value judgment about their relationship with their own. Death makes the living act weird.
Lisa has absolutely no right to make the LW rebuild a relationship with her mother, but I wonder if the push the LW is feeling from Lisa might be at least partially a projection. I second the advice to go to a third party on this one.
no subject
Also, since the LW doesn't give details, I do wonder about exactly what Lisa has said. In my experience, people who haven't lost someone are often so uncomfortable around death that if a loved one talks about their dead, that can often be perceived in all kinds of surreal ways. I've talked about my dead loved ones in completely innocuous ways and had some people, even very dear friends, react with such discomfort that they left the room. Other times people have perceived me to be saying something about my dead relatives as if I were making a value judgment about their relationship with their own. Death makes the living act weird.
Lisa has absolutely no right to make the LW rebuild a relationship with her mother, but I wonder if the push the LW is feeling from Lisa might be at least partially a projection. I second the advice to go to a third party on this one.